Soms zit het tegen en soms zit het mee. Deze week had ik een flinke tegenslag te pakken. Voor mijn opleiding aan Nyenrode moest ik mondeling tentamen afleggen. Als ik dit zou halen stond alleen m’n scriptie nog op mijn to-do-lijstje.
Om voor het tentamen weer in de theorie te komen ben ik extra lessen gaan volgen. Drie avonden heb ik privé les gehad. Door de woorden van de leraar ging ik met enige zelfvertrouwen naar het tentamen. Helaas verliep het mondeling geheel anders dan gepland en ook nog wel op de manier waar ik eigenlijk bang voor was. Het resultaat was dan ook zeer slecht.
Bij voorbaat had ik aangegeven dat dit tentamen voor mij de doorslag zou geven om de studie af te ronden of er mee te stoppen. Aangezien in juli 2013 mijn eerste mastervak verloopt zag ik geen mogelijkheid meer om de studie af te ronden. Gelukkig kwamen de examinatoren met de mededeling dat ik in kon stromen in de huidige cursus, zodat ik in januari alsnog mee kan doen aan de nieuwe tentamenronde.
Maandag en dinsdag waren voor mij de dagen dat de moed mij ver in de schoenen was gezakt en ik nergens de motivatie vandaan kon halen om toe te geven de cursus te gaan volgen.
Na gesprekken met diversen ben ik tot de conclusie gekomen dat het toch wel heel zonde is van alle jaren bloed, zweet en tranen zonder het uiteindelijke doel te hebben bereikt.
Dat doel wil ik halen!! Hiervoor ga ik vanaf morgen weer terug de collegebanken in…
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